Saturday, March 25, 2006

fuck

I didn't even realize what it said until now. And it fucking pisses me off. So I'll throw my tantrum and play my game until I get begging. And this is my cycle of ruining anything remotely good. Even though I can never tell if it really is actually good to begin with. Why am I always so lost when it comes to figuring out the truth. I HATE SKETCHYNESS.

and right now i hate my parents and i hate my sister. i hate her for all of this. i'm so frustrated right now I can't even describe it. I've cried more because of her in the past 2 months than anything else. Shes so selfish. I get blamed and interrogated for everything because of her. I DONT KNOW ANYTHING STOP ASKING ME. ASK HER. I hate this i hate crying. I want to leave all of this. I need to get my mind someplace else tonight.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

silent mornings

so I'm back in Florida. My time up north was amazing. I can't even begin to explain it all. Things fell into place, It seemed like everyone realized what they wanted that weekend. The "p's" got thrown out. I'm half excited and half scared out of my mind. But of course, I allllwaayyysss ignore the latter of the two. I move in about 6 weeks. I can't wait. I can't wait. That's all I can keep saying. This is a much needed change. I don't know what will happen by the end of the summer, but I'll play it by ear; like always. I get tattooed on Friday and the struggle to hide it from my mother will start. oh god...

oh and I am down to my last $100 so I'm getting another job this weekend. I'm excited, mostly because I love money. This will be weird.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

falling in

I am a liar. I saw it and I kind of do care. I don't know how I feel about this situation. Although, I already knew this.